I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
