yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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