ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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