All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
MIDGETS
????
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
