loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
