please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize