Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize