erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
