I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize