woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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