We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
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