I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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