proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize