Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
i think im in europe. pls send help
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
