the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
