Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
