When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
