glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
