Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
