used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I'm like, not good at living.
Couch. On fire.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
