the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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