And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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