Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work