Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
