jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
