his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The uberlube is also flammable
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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