I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
