I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
