Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
