Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
