that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
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triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
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Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me