I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
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I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
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I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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