his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
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All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
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As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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