omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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