u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
