Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
i've created a new STD.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
