Why are handjobs necessary in class?
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
