i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
