I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Reggie can tackle my bush.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
