Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
