My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Ladies don't puke and tell
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
