we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
