Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
