i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure