Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Randomize
