I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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