Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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