It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
