Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
