it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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