It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
