Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
